I Do!

I have been groom hunting. When people ask me what your expectations are, I draw a blank. Not because I am hapless person who is cluelessly drifting her way across life, but because people never cease to surprise (or shock) me. And so a checklist of expectations seems foolhardy at this point.

I consider myself to be an easy going and a rather tolerant person who insists on believing that every person has a right to lead their own life, and a right to have their own perspective. I do not judge, not unless you intentionally plan to hurt someone... that just makes you cruel.

So when someone asks me what my expectations are, I rack my brains for a fitting reply. Normally, I would have come up with a logical sequence of things, but in this matter, I am bewildered.

1.       1. Would you be ok with a business family I was once asked. My reply was ofcourse, would they let me work? Ofcourse you can work was the retort.

2.       

2.        2. Would you mind if the guy was not as educated as you, (rack rack rack..)? I responded that I will continue to educate myself and enhance my knowledge, somebody has to earn a living, so yes ofcourse , his educational background has no bearing, provided he understands and respects me.

I don’t think there is any point in telling you all what a disastrous encounter my these two viewpoints managed to create. This particular guy asked me how come I was so confident of myself (why shouldn’t I be?) and if that “overconfidence will turn me so that I will rule him” Rest is best left unsaid.

There were a million other uncouth questions that I rather not broach on this cyber space. An arranged marriage has its merits I have heard. I am choosing to keep my faith in them and….(For my Star Trek fellow fans…… ) “To bravely go where I have not gone before!!! “

Rainwater Harvesting??!!

Hopefully this is the final onslaught of the monsoons.. cause our ceiling has started leaking!

The environmentalist in me has predictably & possibly sub-consciously decided to harvest the previous drops threatening to create a water body in our bedroom! :) ;) Despite this.. was, is and always shall be a big fan of the monsoons! Tip tip barsa pani...

Child's Play??!!

On eve of Teacher's Day I found myself speculating on "What do children teach us?"

The question delivered some surprising results!

They teach us to:
•       Love like you have never been hurt!
My friend’s 2 year old comes running up to me... most times just wanting to be held, always wanting to be pampered or just wanting to be tickled. They never pause to think, what if we the super busy, accomplished adults push them away???.... Are they that comfortable in their own skin, or are they just plain secure? Who
knows!

•       Trust as if there is only goodness in everyone; 
I remember running to a ballon-wala when I was about 5 or 6 years old and handing him my pursue (when it was time to pay for my balloon) cause I didn't know how to count back then.

•       Be laughed at and grin with us at their own silly antiques! 
Again not sure if it’s the security they feel of being the constant receiver of unconditional love, or because they haven’t been introduced to the concept of an insult!

•       Feel overwhelming relief and the true meaning of joy; 
This is definitely cause they have no inkling of what sorrow is and what it can do to a person. I pray they continue to feel this for as long as possible!

•       Innocence as a strength;
Best example is when they first inquire about the bees and birds story. 
A joke I read someplace:
Little boy to a pregnant lady in the doctor’s office: “Is that a baby in your tummy?” 
Lady replies with a smile “Yes!” 
The boy with a little bit of concern “Was it a good baby?” 
Lady replies with a bigger smile “Very good baby!” 
A very scared boy asked “Then why did you eat it?!!”

•       Tomorrow never dies: 
When they forget their fights and “sorrys” seem to fix all the problems in their world!

Guess we all have a great deal to learn from the refresher course on life taught by these very enthusiastic & tiny little souls :)

Sundar Sundar Sangli

I have taken a long leave of absence from this personal cyber space here… mostly cause I haven’t really travelled or noted anything worthy to share. Laziness – a defining factor of the Leonine gene, of course didn’t exactly help things along. Finally, I took a trip (official) to Sangli a district in Western Maharashtra. As a part of my workday, we trotted through agricultural fields for 3 days and what an experience it was! Overcast skies screened us from the otherwise scorching sun that typically lights up this rain shadow region. A light drizzle accompanied the gentle breeze that cooled our weary bodies as we trekked across fields and unpaved dusty roads. The vast expanse of land interspersed with trees and a non-uniform grassy cover reminded me of Texan plains and how they would have looked following a “storm” (my Texan friends call even small rain events storms if they linger for more than couple hours)! I sorely missed my easel and canvass as the countryside lay there as though waiting to be captured on to a canvass or camera reel. It was a perfect setting for a love duet (for our beloved Bollywood flicks), a stage for the female lead seducing her lover to a haunting number! Chopra clan are you listening? J

May Justice be Served

Justice Verma,

I am an educated, independent and compassionate person. I am a citizen of India and am proud to be called so... most days. I would like to voice my opinions in response to GOI's call out for suggestions on amendments to rape laws. It is my earnest request that you take time to read of our fears and pleas for better protection from our legal system.

1.)  Regardless of age, a juvenile or adult rapist MUST serve the same sentence.

2.)  7 years imprisonment seems like an encouragement for these deranged villains who rob victims of their dignity and self respect, to say nothing of their self worth and self confidence. The key word here is self... the aim should be to make the victim feel safe and justice be served upon her, as she attempts to restart a normal life braving her way out with emotional scars.

3.) A minimum of 20 years imprisonment seems like a start for these animals. I would vote for solitary confinement to go with it. Additionally, for special cases, where the assailant has tortured the victim in addition to raping her, death penalty is a MUST. There is no room for compassion for these inhumane crimes and that should be made loud and clear. Sometimes it becomes necessary to make an example of out a few hardened and soulless criminals to deter others who wish to follow in their footsteps. I am afraid, a 7 year sentence maybe acceptable to such criminals who may even think of it as a worthwhile price to pay.

4.) Some are far too gone to be reformed and cannot be trusted to live in this society again. It is the duty of the justice department to step up and protect its citizens and it is high time they serve us well.

Trust you give due consideration to our opinions and fears of living in a society, where women like me have to think twice before stepping out after sundown.

Respectfully

P

I have emailed this to :  justice.verma@nic.in

You can send in your suggestions too.