Back in a decade!

 I chanced upon my own blog, after almost a decade and am pleasantly surprised,... its as if I am being introduced to my younger self! 

Life has definitely changed and funnily, I feel like I know myself "now", as opposed to "then"! Or perhaps, as we all do, I have changed, as life as worked its magic on me! 

Here are some of my favorite things

1. I love where I am, who I am, and how I am!

2. Absolutely love my curls! finally found a way to tame them.

3. Discovered that learning is never ending. If you choose to listen, you can benefit from each situation, each time.

4.  Quiet starts to a day are a luxury one can afford.

5. Less is indeed more! If only, I can do that more!

6. Gratitude, Grace and Grit and can get you anything you want!

7. Love, Lazy Lamhes and Lava Cakes in moderation may serve us well!

8. Forgiveness will set you free. A good memory to avoid the idiots you forgave will keep you sane!

9. An ability to look for an opportunity in loss, a strategy through disaster and a way back to mental peace through chaos is worth a million dollars. 

10. Do what you love. Grab that moment. If you really want to do all the things you love, learn to love discipline. 

 

Until later

P 

My Dearest P

My dearest P,

You answer yes to each and every question below! You indeed are God's gift to me!

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living.

I want to know what you ache for,

and if you dare to dream

of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are.

I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon.

I want to know if you have touched

the center of your own sorrow,

if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy,

mine, or your own,

if you can dance with wildness

and let the ecstasy fill you

to the tips of your fingers and toes

without cautioning us to be careful,

to be realistic,

to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me

if the story you are telling me is true.

I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty,

even when it's not pretty, every day,

and if you can source your own life

from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of a full moon, "Yes!"

It doesn't interest me to know

where you live or how much money you have.

I want to know if you can get up,

after a night of grief and despair,

weary and bruised to the bone,

and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know

or how you came to be here.

I want to know if you will stand

in the center of the fire with me

and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me

where or what or with whom you have studied.

I want to know what sustains you, from the inside when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments. 

Love and grief

When a baby is born, he is not yet conscious of his-self. He knows only hunger and sleep and is mostly surprised by external stimuli. Somewhere along the way to being a man, he learns the ways of this world and is introduced to this bizarre, absurd concept on love! Love adds color, purpose and a sense of belonging to in life. It provides a safe haven, comfort, joy and peace.

When you lose someone special in your life, it feels like that love which has no where to go, is constricting your heart, and it causes the scary sadness, we call grief. Those who have lived through grief will tell you that its nature's way of healing a heart in love. Just like a physical injury needs to heal, grief allows an emotional injury To heal.

It's the heart's way of paying homage to the one it loved. With time, grief takes away the pain of absence of your loved one and leaves instead beautiful memories to be cherished.

So sometimes we just need to give "time" sometime to heal us. And pray that the soul of our loved one finds purpose again in this universe.

Here's to keeping my faith in this wonderful emotion we call love and trusting grief  to hand back my precious memories sans the pain soon.

Miss you V-ajji: you were and will always be an epitome of grace, strength and dignity
Misss you S-ajji: you were and will always be an epitome of humility, kindness and compassion
I hope I can grow to be half the women you were, I hope to be that lucky

Reunion

Reunions are fun when you love your batch mates. And how much the lot of us does was apparent from the fun and laughter that drowned us all last long weekend!

We were meeting (together) after almost 9 years and how much life has changed! To begin with, I was very concerned that we wouldn't make it to the weekend, cause we had 3 infants amongst us! But Lady Luck probably wanted to join our late night gossip sessions, and so micracously we all made it 😀

After settling in on the first day, we headed out to lovely beachside seafood restaurant.
Next day we headed to the beach which was a mere 5 min walk from our villa! Burdened with diaper bags, baby foods and sunblock we trekked our way across to a cozy beach area and hid from the scorching sun under beach umbrellas! While the babies napped A and I risked a swim in the Atlantic waters! How much warmer it is than far up north! It was so heavenly that it was almost unfair! As we sipped our frozen drinks by the beach, the babies woke up and enjoyed playing in the sand. Our pop up tent was the perfect shelter For little P as he grabbed sand and squealed as it slipped within his fingers. He also loved to feel the waves crash against his legs. He seemed a little surprised to see the waters recede as he squatted on the shore, attempting to grab the waves. He finally managed to gulp down couple salty mouthfuls before daddy grabbed him and held him up. His excitement did not wane as he giggled at mommy lounging in ankle deeep waters 😊
After nap time the lot of us gathered for a lovely dinner at the salty dog to remince old times.
Next day arrived with promises of lazy lamhes as decided on the previous night! Somehow we still ended up on a biking tour with all 4 kids in kiddie karts and tandem bikes. It was a fabulous 2 hour ride that ended with a quick lunch. The sky literally opened up but failed to drown our excitement! We hurried to the south end of the island for a boat trip and just made it in time. Over the next hour, we spotted at least a dozen dolphins as they came up for air. It was my first time seeing dolphins and I relished the excitement.

As we bid goodbye the next day, promising to meet again next year, I couldn't help but wonder how different our lives would be then! 😊

Until then.. adios!

My sweetest four legged friend

My soul sister's little pup visited us this weekend. I have always loved dogs, but after almost being attacked by a German shepherd as a little girl, I am a bit wary of them!

So with a wee bit of apprehension I prepared for the arrival of little Oreo! He not only remembered us, from our last meetings, but also recognized our place instantly. I could feel the excitement as he dragged his beloved A&A, scampering towards us. I instinctively ducked for cover behind our apartment door! Oreo ofcourse mistook that for a game and came charging in, happy to play what I am sure he thought was doggie version of hide and seek! :)

We watched "Max" together, and that's when we saw Oreo's compassionate side. It was so endearing to watch him whine when Max grieved his handler's passing. He whined in concern, perhaps sharing his pain! I spent the evening, watching Oreo's reaction to the movie, which was far more fascinating. Its unfathomable, the depths of how much they feel and connect with us humans. So much kindness, so much trust and unquestioning loyalty, never fails to touch me.

The two days just whizzed past us and he kept our energy high.  He relaxed in the back seat for most of the drive, lounging on his travel mattress! Yes, our Oreo does travel in style!

The morning the trio left, we left too, not wanting to miss him so much! Oreo really is like a child, full of life, love and ofcourse energy! :)

Miss you, little cookie!

Diving in New England

What picture forms in your mind when you hear diving? I have a theory.. The picture that forms tells you a little about yourself! Here is a plausible set of explanations:

1. Diving in the pool- you are swimmer or hope to be one 😎🏊
2. Sky diving - you are crazy adventurous (ignore me, my fear of heights is simply making me jealous of your drive for extreme sports)
3. Scuba dive - you are a rockstar (read just like me 😁)

Coming back to my post of the month, I tried scuba diving in New England! For those of my friends on the other side of the world, New England is notorious for its cold cold winters and cold waters most year around! So only a zealous idiot like me who despite having zero tolerance for the cold would attempt such a feat! What motivated me to attempt diving here? Well, my last instructor had indicated that diving in the cold water was a different experience and the underwater scenery is completely different from that seen in temperate waters! Plus I heard that the visibility is far superior!

So when I finally had the frigid opportunity to dive in colder waters, I refused to pass! I began with my search of local dive schools in search of a dive buddy who would dive with me! Well to cut a disappointing long story short, my first attempt was disastrous. The first dive school I found managed to worsen my concerns of diving in cold waters and even managed to put the fear of diving in me! But the stubborn me did some more research and found this wonderful couple who run a dive shop and school in Londonderry New Hampshire! Imagine that! Mike from aquatic escapes centre not only gave me my refresher training (I already was MAUI open water certified) but also encouraged me and accompanied me for two dives off the coast in Rockport,MA. I am grateful to mike to get me back to diving (after a gap of three years I was practically an empty slate, save for my muscle memory that served me well). 

The two dives were about 40-55 mins each and were indeed a different experience. The 8mm wet suit insulated me from the cold water (about high 40s F) however it compromised my agility. I saw skeet, some sand colored fish, tons of lobsters and crabs. There was some plankton after a rocky coast with a poor visibility (we were just unlucky I guess). All in all a wonderful experience. 

I did however miss the warm water diving experience and diving in my bathing suit that allows for more agility and easier diving experience.

Hope to visit the New England underwater world next summer again! Until that time I intend to get my exercise on the treadmill and Zumba classes! 

The Year That Was!

This August, marked the one year anniversary of our wedding! As my phone buzzed with "anniversary wishes", I still feel a bit of surprise and almost asked, "what anniversary" :)

As a double celebration we decided to drive to New York City and catch the Broadway show "Mamma Mia". Broadway Theatre performances are simply exemplary and showcase the best singing and acting performances. As the play started to "Mamma Mia" song, I was a bit disappointed in the lead actor's singing performance. It appeared as though she had an ordinary voice.  But as the show continued her performances improved and her best was "Winner Takes it All", so much so that the entire theatre was clapping and cheering even before she finished the song. It may just be that the lead was "saving" her voice for that spectacular performance. "My P" had not seen the movie, and so it was a new experience for him, unlike ours, which was the slightest bit tainted by the movie expectations!

At the end of the show, they encouraged the audiences to join and I sang at the top of my lungs. We had so much fun that even the hot and muggy NYC weather or the terrible hustle of Times Square could not ware it off! We even attempted to get a caricature done, hoping it would be a wonderful reminder of our celebration, but alas, as fun as it was, the caricature couple does not resemble us too much!
After a fabulous chaat-filled dinner with R and her twins and family we called it a wonderful day!

Happy First to Us! :)